There is that certain whiteshoe-waft around these slippery sorts’ sales campaigns and isn’t it getting oh-so worse?The word tosser comes to mind. A top wheeler and dealer in the industry put it more succinctly this week when they described many in the game as “small dick, small man syndrome” – couple that with a big boy ego. It’s all too easy to put them in the same league as parking inspectors, lawyers and, dare we say it, sensation-seeking journalists?An anonymous Instagram account, Lords of Property, is taking the real estate industry by the jugular. The page is gaining thousands of followers a day after starting last month. Agents are laughing it off but behind closed doors at open houses, they are reeling.Lords of Property is a bit like CelebSpellcheck, which poked fun at influencers and reality wannabes getting into grammatical quagmires. Thin-skinned influencers reportedly hired private detectives to snout out the catty culprit behind the CelebSpellcheck posts.The account got the shakes over being sued for defo, and now posts innocuous photos of Hollywood celebrities behaving badly. Ho hum! But Lords of Property takes up where CelebSpellcheck left off, shining a bright spotlight on our real estate glitterati.With a gives-zero attitude and bang-on takedowns, the posts poke fun at some of the lengths to which real estate agents will go to get noticed. “Celebrating the deal pigs of real estate that live life we can only dream of,” says the page’s bio.Lords of Property told Page 13 the page was created as a bit of a laugh.“It’s aimed to just showcase the lengths some of these agents go to sell property, which can be funny.”From self-help tutorials to client confessionals, even re-enacting scenes from American Psycho to sell property, they’ll stop at nothing to get the deal. And with a teeth-gnashing two per cent average commission on the ultimate selling price, it’s no wonder. Marty Fox, the founder and director of Whitefox, with a catchline on his website “Bold, Polished, Matter of Fact,” is taken to task. Biggin & Scott’s Port Melbourne agent Fraser Lack gets a serve for parading his big bank credentials, duck-pouting-to-camera dog walks and fine threads. Lack told Page 13 he asked for the content to be removed from the account, but to little avail.“I have no comment,” Lack said. “But it’s clever, I’ll give them that. It’s getting a lot of traction, a week ago they had about 500 followers and now it’s over 9000.” Prince of Pascoe Vale Claudio Cuomo told the account to cease and desist, only for that statement to end up being shared. “All’s good and well in fun and giggles,” Cuomo wrote, “However, all jokes aside, we run quite a serious residential real estate practice. “I am making an initial polite request to kindly remove all photo content and reference to Claudio Cuomo and C+M Residential effective immediately. Thank you and have a good day!” This coming from a guy who likens himself to upfront American rapper Pitbull! Cuomo also “politely requested” Page 13 to cease and desist writing about him and the public content he shares on Instagram. But where’s the fun in that? Lords Of Property told Page 13 it was simply a keen observer of the real estate market with the page inspired from sharing agent videos to friends. “It just organically grew from that. We have been surprised how quickly it’s taken off,” Lord of Property says. “It’s a confidence business and everyone’s trying to get the edge on their competition, but with that comes some pretty out-there content. “Some of the production values in their content is incredible. When I find myself watching cinematic-quality remakes of horror movies in their sales campaigns I can’t help but wonder if they are selling themselves or the property?” Just when we thought Zed “ZOLD!” Nasheet of ZED Real Estate dancing at Melbourne’s Shrine of Remembrance to parade a “$100m development site” listing was in bad taste.
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