The controversial groom, who was caught up in a “cheating” scandal on the show this year that ultimately saw him wind up dating fellow contestant Carolina Santos, wrote on his Instagram Story on Friday night that he was “not okay”.“I cry everyday (sic). I’m lost, I’m lonely, I’m scared, I feel immense pressure. I trust no one, I fail, then fail again,” Holmes, 31, said.“The ones I love hurt me, I hurt them back, I’m sorry.”The post sparked speculation his relationship with Santos, 34, could be in a rough patch.Holmes and Santos clashed with many of their co-stars during the 2022 season after sparking up a romance while paired with other people on the show. Just hours later, Holmes returned to Instagram to apologise for his earlier post, admitting he has “struggled” with his mental health “for years”, and had hit “breaking point”.“I’m sorry about my story today,” he wrote to his followers.“I’ve struggled with my mental (sic) for years but particularly the last 6 months. “Today ws a breaking point for me and a level I never want to get to again and would rather forget. I’m only human.“I’m home now and have Carolina with me and tomorrow’s a new day. Love everyone and I see the (messages), love you.”The personal trainer and Santos defied the odds and continued to date once filming wrapped – and just one week ago, Holmes shared a gushing tribute to his girlfriend alongside a picture of them walking their dog.“Been through so much with this girl. It takes something really special to get through what we have coming out of a reality TV show. Only made us stronger!” he wrote.Earlier this year, the personal trainer revealed that he had “abused” steroids for almost eight years, until he signed up to MAFS in 2021.Holmes credited Santos with helping him through his recovery.“It was an addiction that I didn’t want to admit but the reality is I never really came off them in that 7-8 year window,” he wrote on Instagram.“I can look back and realise how much it affected my life. There’s side effects that I’m still dealing with after the years of f**king my hormones.“Anyone that knows me well knows I’m very obsessive with the things I choose to focus on. I have this obsession with being the best I can possibly be.”Mental health support
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