The Melbourne Fashion Festival was back to its former glory marking its 25th anniversary on Thursday after being so rudely shut down last year thanks to COVID restrictions.It was all air kisses and elbow taps in cut-out silhouettes at the National Gallery of Victoria as Pommery champagne poured freely and caviar was served on crinkle-cut chips.Talk about Aussie chic!The sartorial set were in their element, but it wouldn’t be a fashion festival without some FROW murmurings (you know, front row).Elsa Pataky was to be billed as the special guest, but filming her action flick stopped her flying down for the gala runway presented by David Jones.Sculpted noses were already out of joint over the Sydney contingent flown in for runway one.Emerald City names like Lara Bingle, Kate Waterhouse, Tom Steinford, “man-fluencers” The Inspired Unemployed and Adam Goodes who was sporting a new COVID “man bun”, strutted in for the first show. All that was missing was ‘The Biv’ aka Terry Biviano.Melbourne style queens like Brit Selwood, Bec Harding, Emma Hawkins and Elliott Garnaut were relegated to runway two.“If there is a cool team A from Sydney does that make us the daggy team B?” asked one model showing so much shoulder we thought we’d stepped back into the 80s.Not a bit of it. Doesn’t one arrive fashionably late?WHO THE BLOODY HELL DOES LARA THINK SHE IS?So who the bloody hell do you think you are?The world has surely gone bat soup bonkers when Lara Worthington’s contract dictates she doesn’t do red carpet interviews in spite of being flown in to appear at the Melbourne Fashion Festival for a fat fee.It’s quite the transition after bursting onto the scene in a bikini in 2006 as the face of Tourism Australia’s “So where the bloody hell are you?’ campaign (you can thank Scotty from Marketing for that one).She followed the well-trodden path to reality show wannabe, even with her own ill-fated show Being Lara Bingle.Then she was a WAG on the arm of infatuated former cricket captain Michael Clarke.She was even caught up in a nude photo scandal before that was a weekly happening for the AFL.Bingle tried to sue Brendan Fevola over the distribution of a revealing picture taken on a mobile phone during the pair’s brief dalliance.The case was thrown out. Different strokes for different folks a decade ago.Now Worthington is so high up the fashion food chain she doesn’t need to utter a single syllable.Wearing a cut-out Dion Lee number with a price tag of $1990, the now mum-of-three was flanked by her entourage as she was carefully positioned on the red carpet, giving off her best blue-eyed-steel before being ushered into the frow as the festival’s special guest at the National Gallery of Victoria.No word to be heard, but does it matter in the Insta-era? Because boy the Cronulla gal knows how to make the snappers happy.
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